Die mistieke self-prysgawe.
Wanneer ‘n mens die volgende uittreksel lees uit Hammerskjöld se Merkstene lyk dit op die oog af ‘n baie mistieke, selfs moeilike stuk.
Maar dit word glashelder wanneer ‘n mens die tweede stuk lees, wat ek in Engels aan die einde byvoeg. Dit is die moeite werd om albei stukke te lees en om dan weer na hierdie eerste stuk terug te kom.
Jou “persoonlike” lewe kan nie ‘n durende, innerlike betekenis hê nie. Dit kan een of ander toevallige betekenis hê, maar net deurdat dit inpas by en onderwerp is aan iets wat “durend” is en wat betekenis het. Kan hierdie “iets” dit wees wat ons probeer omskrywe as “Lewe”? Kan jou lewe betekenis hê as ‘n klein deeltjie van lewe?
Bestaan Lewe? Soek en jy sal vind: ervaar Lewe as ‘n werklikheid. Het Lewe betekenis? Ervaar Lewe as ‘n werklikheid en die vraag word sinloos.
Soek-? Soek deur die sprong te waag tot onvoorwaardelike gehoorsaamheid. Waag dit wanneer jy uitgedaag word, want alleen as jy uitgedaag word sal jy opmerk dat die pad 'n vurk maak. Dan sal jy, ten volle bewus van jou keuse tot gehoorsaamheid, jou rug op jou persoonlike lewe draai sonder enige reg om ooit terug te kyk.
Jy sal ontdek dat jy, “in hierdie patroon”, bevry word van die behoefte om saam met die groep te leef.
Jy sal ontdek dat deur jou onderwerping jou lewe sy volle betekenis van die Lewe sal ontvang, ongeag enige voorwaardes wat aan jou gestel word vir die verwerkliking daarvan.
Jy sal ontdek dat die vryheid van voortdurende afskeid, van die self-prysgawe van uur tot uur, aan jou ervaring van die werklikheid ‘n suiwerheid en duidelikheid sal gee wat vir jou self-verwerkliking sal beteken.
Jy sal ontdek dat gehoorsaamheid ‘n wilshandeling vra wat gedurig weer bevestig moet word. Jy sal ontdek dat jy misluk as enige iets in jou persoonlike lewe terug in die sentrum beland.
Hierdie kriptiese, mistieke taal van Hammerskjöld word duidelik wanneer hy baie eenvoudig sy eie lewe en oortuigings beskryf. Hy doen dit as volg:
"The world in which I grew up was dominated by principles and ideals of a time far from ours and as it may seem, far removed from the problems facing a man in the middle of the twentieth century. However, my way has not meant a departure from those ideals. On the contrary. I have been led to an understanding of their validity also for our world today. Thus, a never abandoned effort, frankly and squarely to build up a personal belief in the light of experience and honest thinking has led me in a circle; I now recognize and endorse, unreservedly, those very beliefs which once were handed down to me.
From generations of soldiers and government officials on my father's side, I inherited a belief that no life was more satisfactory, than one of selfless service to your country or humanity. This service required a sacrifice of all personal interests, but likewise, the courage to stand up unflinchingly for your convictions.
From scholars and clergymen on my mother's side, I inherited a belief that, in the very radical sense of the Gospels, all men were equals as children of God, and should be met and treated by us as our masters in God.
Faith is a state of the mind and the soul. In this sense we can understand the words of the Spanish mystic, St. John of the Cross: 'Faith is the union of God with the soul'. The language of religion is a set of formulas which register a basic spiritual experience. It must not be regarded as describing in terms to be defined by philosophy, the reality which is accessible to our senses and which we can analyze with the tools of logic. I was late in understanding what this meant. When I finally reached that point, the beliefs in which I was brought up and which, in fact, had given my life direction, even while my intellect still challenged their validity, were recognized by me, as mine in their own right and by my free choice. I feel that I can endorse those convictions without any compromise, with the demands of that intellectual honesty, which is very key to the maturity of mind.
The two ideals which dominated my childhood world, met me, fully harmonized and adjusted to the demands of our world of today, in the ethics of Albert Schweitzer, where the ideal of service is supported by and supports the basic attitude to man set forth in the Gospels. In his work I also found a key for modern man, to the world of Gospels.
But the explanation of how a man should live a life of active social service in full harmony with himself as a member of the community of the spirit, I found in the writings of those great medieval mystics for whom "self surrender" had been the way to self realization, and who, in 'singleness of mind' and 'inwardness' had found the strength to say 'yes' to every demand, which the needs of their neighbors made them face, and to say 'yes' also, to every fate that life had in store for them, when they followed the call of duty, as they understood it. 'Love" that much misused and misinterpreted word, for them, meant simply an overflowing of strength with which they felt themselves filled when living in true self-oblivion. And this love found natural expressions in an unhesitant fulfillment of duty and in an unreserved acceptance of life, whatever it brought them personally of toil and suffering-or of happiness.
I know their discoveries about the laws of inner life and of action have not lost their significance.
Dag Hammarskjöld
Dit is ‘n lang pad wat God ons laat loop om by hierdie mistieke insig uit te kom. Wat die gelowige Hammerskjöld doen is om te vertel hoe Jesus se woorde in sy lewensgeskiedenis waar word: Wie sy lewe verloor… En om te laat gebeur wat Johannes die Doper gebid het: Hy moet meer word….
