Fame or love? On the greatest gift of all.

The Dutch tennis player, Sluiter, a well know professional who participated regularly on the world circuit has announced his retirement from professional tennis. He thus joins many others before him – yet his announcement is to some degree unusual. In recent years, he said, he discovered that he lacked the motivation to resume his career after his holidays. He describes himself as a person of feelings, of emotions, who was aware of the cold, often lonely life of the professional tennis circuit. Yet he is someone who is part of a warm, close family that care for relationships. During the serious illness of a family member some time ago, he valued this more than ever before. For two weeks he cried and struggled about her in her illness. Her sickbed made him experience life from a completely different perspective. Though he continued playing tennis for the sake of his family and his ill niece, he fell completely out of touch with himself. As a result he experienced an enormous backlash later on.

We are truly happy not because we have family, I gather from listening to Sluiter talking about his touching insight. But because our family and friends provide us with warmth, closeness, a sense of belonging, of being cared for. Even more, we are truly happy because we can, when it really matters, abandon all our “busy-ness,” our “important” activities, our significant life, for what really matters: to be with people we love. To care for them is even better than to receive it from them.

Sometimes we need to be traumatized in order to understand that our hearts cry out to be with others. If we leave this cry unanswered because of our busy programme and great responsibilities, we sell ourselves to more loneliness and lovelessness.

There is nothing greater than love.